{"id":277,"date":"2014-05-30T21:54:01","date_gmt":"2014-05-30T21:54:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.asdpagh.com\/site\/2014\/05\/30\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\/"},"modified":"2018-02-21T16:38:54","modified_gmt":"2018-02-21T16:38:54","slug":"one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.asdpagh.com\/site\/2014\/05\/30\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\/","title":{"rendered":"“One Flesh”\u2014 A Union of Perfect Love and Perfect Submission"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Elder Enoch Ofori Jnr<\/strong><\/p>\n

(Sabbath, 3rd March, 2012)<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

“In the Beginning” God Created Marriage\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

Today, ‘we’ are getting married. \u00a0Although only two of our number are getting married before God and His Church,\u00a0 to the extent that scripture commands us to share in the joys and pain of one another (1 Cor. 12:25-27), we are in this together.\u00a0 For both the married and the unmarried, today’s ceremony will have lessons for all.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

If you are already married, how pleasing is your marriage in the sight of God? If you are planning to tie the knot, what Biblical understanding do you need to have of the marriage that pleases and honours God?<\/p>\n

God is the author of marriage. Therefore, He alone has the right to define the nature of the marriage institution and the different roles each of the married partners should play for marriage to be the joy and blessing He intended it to be.<\/p>\n

In Matthew 19, the Master tells us plainly that\u00a0 God planned a heterosexual, divorce-free, monogamous marriage for man from the beginning\u00a0 when He created them “male and female” and further commanded that they unite and function in the marital bond as “one flesh” (vv 4-6). Any additions or modifications to this marital form violate the sanctity of marriage as God designed it and are therefore not of Him. The cause is human stubbornness (hard heartedness) in the face of God’s revealed will.\u00a0 This includes not only divorce (vv. 7-8) but also polygamy which originated with Lamech, a self-confessed murderer and the great-great-great-grandson of Cain “who was of that wicked one” (Gen. 4:19, 23-24; 1 John 3:12).<\/p>\n

In the beginning, God created marriage to fill your life with love, joy and purpose.\u00a0 But there are divine principles to observe for this to be realized. Are you ready to lend God an ear?<\/p>\n

Love like Christ, Submit like His Church<\/strong><\/p>\n

In Ephesians chapter 5, God uses the Apostle Paul to define more exactly the different roles and responsibilities He has assigned both husband and wife in the marriage institution. In the context of mutual submission “out of reverence for Christ” (v. 21 NLT), Paul teaches that Christ’s love for the Church and the Church’s submission to Christ epitomizes the respective roles and duties of the Christian husband and the Christian wife.<\/p>\n

The Wife was Created for her Husband<\/strong><\/p>\n

The apostle begins with wifely submission and rightly so (v. 22). Like other godly virtues, submission does not come naturally or easily to people; the natural tendency is to be domineering or at least be independent. \u00a0In fact, God did not originally instruct women to submit to their husbands. The submission of wives to their husbands came about as part of the judgment God pronounced on the first female, Eve, to wit, \u201che shall rule over you<\/em>\u201d, for the principal role she played in man\u2019s disobedience to God and subsequent fall in Eden (Gen. 3:16; 1 Tim. 2:14).<\/p>\n

But here the Christian wife is told to consider her submission to her husband\u2014not as punishment<\/em>\u2014but \u00a0as submission to Christ Himself, out of voluntary acceptance of her husband\u2019s loving leadership, not out of coercion. And the reason is straightforward:\u00a0 the husband is the head of the wife, just as Christ, \u201cthe Saviour of the body\u201d, is the Head of the Church (v. 23).<\/p>\n

The point has been made unambiguously: as long as Christ remains the Head of the Church and the husband the head of the wife, it\u2019s incumbent on Christian wives who fear the Lord to be submissive to their own wives \u201cas to the Lord\u201d!<\/p>\n

Although the subject is still wifely submission, wives are alerted to the fact that their husbands\u2019 headship position is not devoid of responsibility in light of the reference to Christ, the head of the Church, as \u201cthe Saviour of the body\u201d (which is the church). So husbands take your cue from Christ. Your headship of the family is not a titular position. Prove your worth as the head of your wife with deeds and sacrifices that will keep her safe and sound.<\/p>\n

But how is the Christian wife to submit to her husband? How much ground should she give?<\/p>\n

The answer is, \u201cas the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything\u201d (v. 24).<\/p>\n

The operative word is \u201cin everything\u201d, but it\u2019s not about living in mortal fear of your husband as if you were his slave. The \u201csubmission\u201d meant here is derived from the primary God-given role of the wife to be \u201ca helper suitable\u201d for her husband (Gen. 2:18 NASB), since \u201cman was not created for the woman\u2019s sake, but woman for the man\u2019s sake\u201d (1 Cor. 11:9 NASB). \u00a0Thus wifely submission must be expressed with care-giving and service coupled with reverence\u2014that\u2019s how all the holy women of old behaved towards their husbands, including Sarah who called her husband (Abraham) \u201clord\u201d (1 Pet. 3:1-6).<\/p>\n

In Proverbs 31, we see the \u201cvirtuous woman\u201d demonstrate submission to her husband with practical deeds. Her husband recognizes her invaluable role in his life and has complete trust in her intentions towards him (Prov. 31:10-12).<\/p>\n

This godly woman is a diligent homemaker. Eschewing all laziness, she works with her hands and stocks up provisions for her household\u2014even for the poor and needy\u2014through prudent management of resources and wise investments (Prov. 31:13-22).<\/p>\n

A great part of the credit for her husband\u2019s high social standing goes to her for both the moral and practical support she gives him. The result is that \u201cher husband is known in the gates\u201d (Prov. 31:23).<\/p>\n

A woman of fine character in all aspects, the \u201cvirtuous woman\u201d is not only prudent and versatile in industry (Prov. 31:24-25), but also speaks words of wisdom (Prov. 31:26). Her hard work and meticulous care for the family do not go unnoticed by her husband and children who heap praises on her (Prov. 31:27-29).<\/p>\n

The excellent qualities of the \u201cvirtuous woman\u201d are not common to all women but only to one who fears the LORD (Prov. 31:30). She needs not sing her own praises; the works of her hands speak of her worth as a wife and a mother (Prov. 31:31).<\/p>\n

This is how to submit to your husband \u201cin everything\u201d so you will be his fitting helpmate. As a Christian wife who fears the Lord, don\u2019t pretend to submit to your husband because of what you will get from him.\u00a0 Serve him with heartfelt commitment. You might not even be used to serving others, but your husband is not just another\u2014you are \u201cone flesh\u201d with him! Moreover, this submission to your husband is actually to the Lord Jesus Christ, your spiritual Head and Saviour. You cannot afford to displease Him.<\/p>\n

So, submit to your husband as a God-fearing wife even if he\u2019s hard-to-please\u2014and God\u2019s promise is that you will win in the end. The Apostle Peter exhorts Christian wives: \u201cIn the same way, wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, even if some disobey the Christian message, they may be won over without a message by the way their wives live 2 when they observe your pure, reverent lives\u201d (1 Pet 3:1-2 HSCB).<\/p>\n

The Husband was Created to Cherish his Wife<\/strong><\/p>\n

The apostle next deals with the husband\u2019s principal role in marriage:\u00a0 \u2018husbands love your wives in emulation of Christ’s love for the Church, a love He demonstrated by sacrificing Himself for her (v. 25) for the purpose of sanctifying her after having already cleansed her \u201cby the washing of water with the Word\u201d (v. 26)\u2014all for the grand purpose of presenting “to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish\u2019” (v. 27).<\/p>\n

In short, Christ, out of His great love for the Church, made the ultimate sacrifice for her in order to bring her up to His standard of an ideal wife of His. He wanted a \u2018wife\u2019 He could be proud of!<\/p>\n

Love your wife with a similar noble purpose. True love is demonstrated, which should entail sacrifices and hard work aimed at securing a better life for your wife, with whom you might now be struggling in life. In the final analysis, any sacrifices that result in the betterment of your wife redound to your own honour.<\/p>\n

For Christian husbands, it\u2019s high time you realized that the love you show your wives is an exercise in self-love, being an expression of love for your own bodies because “he who loves his wife loves himself” (v. 28)\u2014a most natural, normal thing to do since “no one ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it” (v. 29).<\/p>\n

But this is where we find many African husbands\u2014in fact, the typical African husband\u2014fall short. Whether out of \u2018learned\u2019 habit or cultural inhibition, it\u2019s a well-known fact many African husbands\u2014even as believers\u2014find it difficult to truly bond with their wives. And many hardly express their love for their wives openly in words.<\/p>\n

For the typical African man, his first loyalty is to his extended family (which is not bad in itself but need to be put into perspective); his wife is just an adjunct to his life. She is an outsider.<\/p>\n

But this is not what God says. He says the man \u201cshall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh\u201d (Gen. 2:24). That is \u201cone\u201d in body, mind, and interests. These are not separate individuals, but ONE person! One soul!<\/p>\n

In the absence of such an order in marriage, many an African marriage sadly descends into a kind of love-hate relationship in which two mutually suspicious individuals pretend to be married couples.\u00a0 The man pretends to love his wife; and the wife pretends to serve him. \u00a0But both have only one object in staying married: what each will get out of the relationship from the possessions that have accrued to them in the course of the marriage and the children between them.<\/p>\n

There is complete love lost between husband and wife; they only put up appearances as lovers. After all, when the lady was being married off by her family, one of the pieces of advice traditionally given her was that she should bring back riches to the family but pass on her debts to her husband.\u00a0 Fully aware of this, the husband also keeps all his plans and activities close to his chest, and sometimes justifiably so\u2014some of the ladies cannot be trusted with confidential information. They bare it all to their friends, creating problems for the man. Isn\u2019t this why Micah 7:5 advises men: \u201cPut no trust in a neighbor; have no confidence in a friend; guard the doors of your mouth from her who lies in your arms\u201d (Micah 7:5 ESV)?<\/p>\n

And it\u2019s all because God\u2019s prescription for a happy, successful marriage has been ignored. The married couple is not \u201cone flesh\u201d.\u00a0 Strange as it is, the husband does not love his body as he should!<\/p>\n

But God insists it\u2019s a most unnatural thing to do. For “no one ever hates his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it”. \u00a0So how is the husband supposed to nourish and cherish his body, being his wife?<\/p>\n

Ex. 21:10 gives the answer: the man is to \u201cnourish and cherish\u201d his \u2018body\u2019 by guaranteeing her food, clothing and conjugal rights. If as a husband you fail to provide these essentials out of laziness or ill-will, you have failed as a husband. You will have abdicated your God-given responsibilities as a husband expected to follow the example of Christ in His care for the Church. So husbands give proof of your love for your body (wife) by meeting her needs dutifully. \u00a0Work hard to provide for your family\u2014it\u2019s one proof that you are still in the faith: \u201cBut if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever\u201d (1 Tim. 5:8 ESV).<\/p>\n

Loving the one you love as yourself is the secret of Christ’s love for the Church and the basis on which He relates to the Church in love (29b), for “we [the church] are members of His body” (v. 30).<\/p>\n

Indeed it’s the (basic) principle behind the whole idea of marriage which makes a man and his wife “one flesh” (v. 31).<\/p>\n

But in this lies the great spiritual significance of marriage\u2014as symbolizing the love relationship between Christ and His church whereby He left His Father’s home in heaven to demonstrate His love for His bride, the church (v. 32; cp Gen. 2:21 & John 19:34)<\/p>\n

In his conclusion, the apostle hammers home the point that Christ-like love and godly submission is the be-all and end-all of marriage. So see to practice it as a Christian husband and a Christian wife (v. 33).<\/p>\n

As Christian husbands demonstrating practical love in marriage, you must not be \u201charsh\u201d with your wives when they make their legitimate requests and demands (Col. 3:19). Moreover, you must recognize your wives as \u201cthe weaker vessel\u201d and bear patiently with them so your prayers are not hindered (1 Pet. 3:7).<\/p>\n

For Christian wives practicing submission to their husbands, the same Apostle Paul instructed Titus to instruct the older women to teach the young women to be \u201cbe sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed\u201d (Tit. 2:4-5). \u00a0This should be the status quo in the Christian home for peace and harmony to prevail.<\/p>\n

God help us all to enter marriage in the spirit of submission and true love. Congratulations to the newlyweds. Have a blissful, fruitful marriage in Jesus\u2019 Name!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Elder Enoch Ofori Jnr (Sabbath, 3rd March, 2012) “In the Beginning” God Created Marriage\u00a0 Today, ‘we’ are getting married. \u00a0Although only two of our number are getting married before God and His Church,\u00a0 to the extent that scripture commands us to share in the joys and pain of one another (1 Cor. 12:25-27), we
+ Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-277","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-sabbath-sermon"],"yoast_head":"\n"One Flesh"\u2014 A Union of Perfect Love and Perfect Submission - 7th Day Pentecostal Assemblies<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.asdpagh.com\/site\/2014\/05\/30\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\""One Flesh"\u2014 A Union of Perfect Love and Perfect Submission - 7th Day Pentecostal Assemblies\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"By Elder Enoch Ofori Jnr (Sabbath, 3rd March, 2012) “In the Beginning” God Created Marriage\u00a0 Today, ‘we’ are getting married. \u00a0Although only two of our number are getting married before God and His Church,\u00a0 to the extent that scripture commands us to share in the joys and pain of one another (1 Cor. 12:25-27), we+ Read More\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.asdpagh.com\/site\/2014\/05\/30\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"7th Day Pentecostal Assemblies\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/web.facebook.com\/sdpagh\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2014-05-30T21:54:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2018-02-21T16:38:54+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"7DPA\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"7DPA\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"11 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/2014\\\/05\\\/30\\\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/2014\\\/05\\\/30\\\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"7DPA\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/a6bf8e1b1372725578a092be26dc4108\"},\"headline\":\"“One Flesh”\u2014 A Union of Perfect Love and Perfect Submission\",\"datePublished\":\"2014-05-30T21:54:01+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2018-02-21T16:38:54+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/2014\\\/05\\\/30\\\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":2301,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/#organization\"},\"articleSection\":[\"Sabbath School Sermons\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/2014\\\/05\\\/30\\\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/www.asdpagh.com\\\/site\\\/2014\\\/05\\\/30\\\/one-flesh-a-union-of-perfect-love-and-perfect-submission\\\/\",\"name\":\"\\\"One Flesh\\\"\u2014 A Union of Perfect Love and Perfect Submission - 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